SPIRITUAL MINISTRATION

We have already spoken of how the Master revealed the Mother’s identity with Saraswati, the goddess of learning, who had come down to impart wisdom The wisdom that he spoke of had no worldly connotation, but it meant that flowering of the mind whereby it can have a life-transforming vision of Divinity. This awakening of a higher consciousness was one of the main functions of the Mother. But while we analyse this character and compose different chapters just because it suits our convenience to study a magnificent personality from different points of view, we must remember that it is an indivisible whole, which again draws its sustenance from and has its being in a more basic Entity. This ultimate Power defies all attempts at fragmentation; and so our limited intellect cannot grasp this Infinity. Still through our prismatic mind we try to understand Saradamani Devi as the mother, the guru, or the Deity. But a little thought will convince us that all these three aspects are inalienably blended in her finely integrated and harmonized life. Whenever she appears to us as the Mother, we get also a glimpse of her inherent power of imparting that true knowledge that dispels all ignorance; when we approach her as a guru, she draws us to her lap as a mother; and when we want to recognize the mother and guru in her, we find her seated transcendentally in her divine effulgence. In fact, we cannot discern where any of these mutually dependent aspects ends and another begins. And yet, we have to proceed along this ingenious path of analysis, for man cannot do otherwise. To us, then, she is the mother, full of unquestioning affection; Sarada, the bestower of the highest wisdom; and the Deity (Devi), full of purity, glory, and super-normal powers, and granting salvation to all. Of the early manifestation of the power of spiritual ministration and its evolution in her life, we have already got a glimpse. In the present chapter we shall visualize its consummation.

The power of imparting wisdom that we meet with in the Mother is only one phase of the Divine grace that took human form for the good of all. If we approach this from the point of view of ordinary spiritual relationship, we shall merely be depriving ourselves of a fuller comprehension. The true guru is a saviour, who through his unbounded love accepts the entire responsibility of his disciple. Not only this; often enough he transfers to himself the disciple’s sins and physical maladies and suffers vicariously. He does this consciously; and though he suffers in consequence, he does not give it up. Such instances are plentiful in the Mother’s life; but we shall relate only a few for satisfying the curiosity of the readers. During her last illness at the ‘Udbodhan’, the Mother communicated her inner feelings to a devotee¹ thus, ‘Do you think that even though the Master does not spare this body, I can have any respite till any of the souls whose responsibility I have accepted is left unredeemed? I shall have to be by their side. I have accepted the burden of all their merits and demerits. It is no fun to impart initiation.

What a burden one has to take upon one’s shoulders, and how much thought one has to bestow on them! See, for instance, when your father died, I too felt sad. I thought, “What a trial the Master has now thrust this boy into!” My anxiety is, how you can struggle out of it. That’s why I talked with you so much. How can you understand all this? If you could understand everything, my burden would be less heavy. The Master is making diverse people play in diverse ways; and it is I who have to bear the brunt. I can’t possibly leave those whom I have accepted as my own. ’

This relationship between the guru and the disciple is not established by any formal process for this present span of life; it is an obligation voluntarily undertaken by the guru out of his compassion and lasts for all eternity. The Mother carried on a constant mental japa. In old age, when owing to physical weakness, she had to spend longer hours in her bed, the attendant noticed that she was doing japa even while in bed. At night her sleep was very light, so much so, that she responded to the first call. The attendant might ask in wonder, ‘Are you not asleep, or don’t you get sleep?’ The Mother would reply, ‘What can I do, my son? The boys come and entreat me eagerly. They take the mantra and go home. But nobody does any japa regularly. Some don’t do it even once. Yet as I have shouldered the burden, should I not look after them? That’s why I do japa and pray to the Master, “O Master, grant them enlightenment, grant them emancipation, and do you take on yourself their care in every way here and hereafter! This world is full of trials and tribulations. May they never have to come back again.”’

Into a devotee’s mind the Mother instilled these words of courage and assurance, ‘What fear need you have, my son? Your thought comes to me well enough. You need not do anything; I am doing everything for you.’ The devotee inquired, ‘Do you have to work for all your sons wherever they may be?’ The Mother replied, ‘For all I have to work.’ The devotee further asked, ‘You have so many children; do you remember them all?’ The Mother first admitted that she could not recollect all; and then she explained, ‘I do japa for those whom I can recollect. And for those that I don’t remember I pray to the Master thus, “Master, I have many sons in many places. Do you please look after those whose names I can’t remember, and graciously grant that they may prosper.”’ Out of a childish heedlessness, Swami Vishweshwarananda once suggested to the Mother that, since it was not possible for her to think personally of the welfare of each of her disciples, it was meet and proper to keep their number within practicable limits. The Mother met the accusation in her simple and guileless way by saying, ‘As to that, the Master did not forbid me. He explained so many things to me; would he not have forbidden this if he had felt the need? I entrust all the responsibility to the Master and to him I pray every day, “Do please look after every one of them, wherever they may be.” And mind you, these mantras have all come from the Master—he gave them to me—and they are of proved efficacy.’ In other words, the good of the disciples did not depend merely on their being remembered by the guru; the mantra had its own intrinsic power.

About the power of mantra and the taking over of sins, the Mother said to Brahmachari Rashbihari on another occasion (February 1913), ‘Energy is transferred through a mantra—the guru’s goes to the disciple and the disciple’s comes to the guru. That’s how sin is accepted through the imparting of mantra and the body gets so many diseases. It’s a hard task to be a guru; one has to take over the disciples’ sins. The guru has to take a share if a sin is committed by a disciple. If the disciple is good, the guru also is benefited.’

The Mother was at the Belur Math during the worship of Durga in 1916, when on the second day of the celebration many devotees saluted her by touching her feet. Subsequently Yogin-Ma saw the Mother washing her feet again and again with Ganges water, and she said, ‘What are you at, Mother? You will catch cold as a result of this.’ The Mother replied, ‘How can I explain, Yogen? The body becomes soothed when some people touch my feet, while it is on fire as it were when others do so, and I don’t get relief unless I wash the feet with Ganges water. ’

The Mother suffered, and she was aware of the cause of the suffering, and yet for the disciples’ good she worked without wincing, though on rare occasions one could get an inkling of the real state of things from such casual remarks as this: ‘My God! It’s as though I am having all-day bouts of wrestling— the devotees come in a never-ending stream It is too much for this body. As a result of my prayer to the Master I have succeeded in keeping the mind constantly engaged here through thoughts of Radhu.’ In reality, however, this was a passing mood in a mind that had willingly taken upon itself the task of universal welfare; and though such sentiments expressed her agonies, they never indicated bitterness. Once a devotee said, ‘Mother, it’s said that you have got rheumatism because of your acceptance of the devotees’ sins. I have an earnest prayer to make—don’t you suffer for my sake; ordain it so that I myself may suffer the consequences of my own work.’ The Mother replied quickly, ‘How can that be so, my boy, how can that be so? You keep well, and let me suffer.’

Although the Mother thus suffered for her disciples’ sins, her outlook on sinners was one of pity rather than of hatred. A devotee was apprehensive that even after getting a mother like the Holy Mother he might not have his life’s objective fulfilled. The Mother encouraged him saying, ‘Why are you afraid, son? Know that the Master is ever behind you. And I am there. Don’t fear so long as I am your Mother. For the Master has truly promised to me, “At the last moment I shall lead by the hand all those who will come to you.” Whatsoever any one of you may do, and howsoever any one may behave, the Master will have to come at last to take you. The Lord has given (men) hands and feet (the senses); and sure enough, they will have their play.’

A woman of a respectable family, who had misbehaved through some evil impulse, became penitent and was led by good luck to the Holy Mother. She stood trembling with a sense of her guilt at the doorway and said, ‘Mother, what will be my lot? I am not fit to draw nearer to you in this holy chapel.’ The Mother stepped forward and throwing her holy arms round the woman’s neck, said, ‘Come, my daughter, come in. You have realized what sin is, and you are repentant. Come, I shall initiate you. Lay everything at the Master’s feet; and cast away all fear.’ The Mother herself explained one day the cause of this unstinted love, ‘Why, my dear, did the Master come only to enjoy rasagollas?’

In association with her vicarious suffering for the sins of others was to be found an unquenchable desire for doing good. If she had no new devotee at her place at Jayrambati, she would often be heard to say, ‘There’s no devotee today.’ When Swami Gaurishananda was at Jayrambati, the Mother’s rheumatism had worsened, making it difficult for her to move about freely. But even in that state the Swami heard her say one day to the Master, ‘This day, too, is going in vain! No one has turned up today! Did you not say, “You will have to do some thing or other every day?”’ She kept on looking out to see if anyone was coming, saying to the Master with fixed eyes, ‘How is it, Master? Will the day go in vain?’ The Mother’s face brightened up when three devotees came the next day.

She used to say, ‘I impart mantra out of pity. They become importunate, they weep, their sight fills me with mercy. Out of compassion I grant initiation. Else what do I gain? One has to take over sins by giving initiation. I think thus, “The body will go anyhow: still let them have something.”’ A devotee one day (January 1912) communicated to the Mother a dream in which a certain man was begging her for initiation and she was refusing him saying, ‘If I do anything to this man just now, then I shall not live, — my body will fall away.’ The dreamer also forbade the Mother; still she did something to the man by touching his chest and neck while repeating those words of apprehension. Hearing of the dream the Mother said, ‘I become so disgusted at times by the supplication of some people that I think, “This body will certainly fall off; so let it go even now; let me give him mantra. At Banaras, the Mother said on another occasion (November 1912), ‘I don’t remember to have done any sin from my birth. I touched him (Sri Ramakrishna) when I was five years old. Even granting that my wisdom had not developed then, there’s no denying the fact that he touched me. Why should I then have such ordeals? Others are becoming free by virtue of their having touched him; and is my delusion alone so exceptionally great? My mind that tries to soar high day and night, I keep down through compassion for these people.’ At the Koalpara Ashrama, a devotee advised the Mother, ‘Since the touch of your devotees makes you suffer, it is better to avoid it.’ But the Mother replied, ‘No, my son, it’s for this that we came. If we don’t take over the sins and sufferings, and don’t digest them, who else will? Who else will bear the burden of the sinners?’ She said, however, ‘A pure man’s touch brings joy.’ But we are at present pursuing a different topic; now we are discussing the unquestioning love of the ever graceful Mother.

One morning three devotees came to Jayrambati with a letter of introduction from Swami Brahmananda. The Mother heard the letter read out and called in the devotees; but she sat with her legs folded, though it was usual for her, because of her rheumatism, to keep them stretched out even in the presence of devotees. After the devotees had saluted her, she was heard saying, ‘So, at last Rakhal has sent me these!’ She refused to initiate them and directed them to go to the Belur Math. The devotees obeyed her for the time being and went to the outer apartment. But their disappointment was too great to be easily assuaged; and hence they approached her for the second time to be more propitious. She, however, was inflexible and spoke to the Master thus, ‘Master, I prayed to you yesterday that the day might not pass uselessly. And at long last you too bring these!’ Inexorability was, however, against her grain; and she yielded at last saying, ‘Master, let me carry on your work so long as the body lasts.’ The initiation was duly finished. A few days later Swamis Brahmananda, Premananda, Shivananda, and Saradananda heard the whole incident sitting on the upper verandah of the Belur Math on the Ganges side. The narration over, Swami Brahmananda sat without a word for a pretty long time. Swami Premananda heaved a long sigh and said with folded hands, ‘Mercy, mercy! It’s by this glorious compassion that the Mother is protecting us for ever. We can’t express in words the poison that she has accepted. If we had done so, we would have been burnt down to ashes. ’

Swayed by compassion, the Mother could not sometimes take care of her own health. Once when she had become very feeble owing to continuous suffering from malaria, and by Swami Saradananda’s instruction interviews etc., had been suspended, there came a visitor from Barisal. Then ensued a discussion among the attendants as to whether he should be allowed to see the

Mother. She, however, heard something of the talk that was going on and, coming to the door of the house, told Swami Parameshwarananda, ‘Why do you prevent his coming?’ The Swami replied, ‘Swami Saradananda has ordered us to do so.’ At this she said firmly, ‘What has Sarat to say? That’s why we have come. I shall initiate him’ And in truth she did initiate him the next day.

A devotee, however weak he might be, would have an accession of strength, courage and faith, if he could but come to the Mother. A devotee could not have peace of mind although he made japa. The Mother told him encouragingly that the mind would be pacified by practice.

But this could hardly comfort him He had heard that if a disciple failed to make japa, it harmed the guru; hence he wanted to return the mantra to the Mother. At this she said, ‘Now see, how he talks! I lose my sleep in thought of you all; and the Master has blessed you long ago. ’ Tears rolled down her cheeks as she spoke; and with emotions she continued, ‘Well, you need not make any japa of the mantra any more.’ The devotee returned to his senses now, and in consternation he ejaculated, ‘Mother, so you snatch away everything I had! What am I to do now? Am I, then, O Mother, condemned to hell?’ The Mother at once uttered these heartening words, ‘What! You, who are my son, will be damned! Whoever has come here, whoever is my son is already redeemed-Destiny dare not throw my children into hell. Free yourself from all anxiety by entrusting your future to me. And remember this always, that there’s one behind you who will come to you at the right moment and leads you to the everlasting domain.’ In a similar position she cheered up another drooping spirit with the words, ‘Whatever may be the position now (i.e., even though japa and meditation may not be very regular), the Master will have to come at last (to take you). He himself promised this; can his own words be meaningless? Do as it pleases you. ’

On receiving a despondent letter at Jayrambati from a Sannyasin disciple in 1916, she said, ‘How is that, my dear! Is the Master’s name such an empty word as to go in vain? That name can never fail. Those who have come here with their minds fixed on the Master, will have the vision of their chosen Deity as a dead certainty. If they don’t get this at any other time, they can’t but have it at the time of death. ’

In the foregoing assurance the Mother has drawn pointed attention to the need of strengthening one’s faith for the chosen Deity or for both the guru and the chosen Deity. In the two illustrations we adduce now, faith and reverence for the guru are more prominently emphasized. Sri Mahendranath Gupta, on his arrival at Jayrambati in 1915, imagined that any meditation or japa undertaken at the holy village of the Mother’s nativity would lead to greater results. Therefore he overdid these a little one day. When he went to salute the Mother that day, she said, ‘Now that you are with your mother, what’s the need of so much japa and meditation? I, indeed, am doing everything for you. Now eat and live merrily, free from all care.’

In 1907, Swami Girijananda, then a Brahmachari, was told by the Mother at Jayrambati, ‘My boy, it’s not proper to make any japa in the guru’s house.’ And yet a little earlier he had been told by her, ‘The repetition of the mantra for at least one hundred and eight times in accordance with the guru’s direction must be done by you every day without fail. Then, again, you are holy men; you will have to do japa always.’ Finding the two instructions rather contradictory, Girijananda asked, ‘Should I then forgo the repetition of the mantra even for one hundred and eight times?’ ‘You will repeat one hundred and eight times as instructed by the guru’, corrected the Mother at once, ‘but nothing more.’

In these invaluable talks one gets on the one hand examples of the promise of redemption coupled with generation of faith, and on the other hand indication of acceptance of the responsibility of the disciple and a fervent appeal for cultivating love for the guru and God. In this connection we recall — first, that the Master asked Girishchandra Ghosh to give up all formal practices and to execute a power of attorney, as it were, in favour of the Master to do everything in his stead; and secondly, that Jesus Christ indicated that as a marriage party spends the time in merriment in the bridegroom’s company, so also if Christ’s disciples cultivated real love for him rather than punctiliousness for formalities, they would be nearer Heaven. In the Svetasvatara Upanishad (VI.23), love for the guru and God has been eulogized as an absolute necessity. In fact, how can one meditate upon another if one has no love for the entity concerned? And how can one have any faith in any wisdom, if one has it not for the teacher? Therefore it was that the Mother shouldered her children’s responsibility, and loved them fondly, and in return expected them to love her equally and to accept her as the one guiding star of their lives.

But the above discussion should not make any reader jump to the conclusion that the Mother decried japa or meditation, or for the matter of that, any formal practice as such. If that were so, why did she initiate hundreds of her disciples, and why did she train them in spiritual practices? In fact, the above examples are extraordinary, and they underline something more fundamental than meets the eye. We introduced them simply because uncommon examples more easily bring into prominence the essential qualities of a rare personality. But if we confine our vision merely to these events, we shall have at best a partial view of the character we are studying. She came for the generality of people and spent her life among them Hence to understand her fully we must descend to this level of common man. We shall find here that for ordinary men she chose an integrated formal path of faith and devotion, into which she breathed a new life; and she made easy and enjoyable a strict spiritual discipline that was otherwise hard and horrifying.

After initiation, Sri Nareshchandra Chakravarty asked her, ‘Mother, shall I have to become a vegetarian now?’ The Mother replied, ‘What a question! Why should you be a vegetarian? Why should my boys be vegetarians? You should eat plentifully and live cheerfully.’ But when he asked again, ‘ Suppose I can’t do japa of the mantra of my chosen Deity,’ the Mother said with a firm voice, ‘What do you mean? You won’t do japa of your mantra? What a suggestion! If you don’t do the japa, you lose; that affects me not in the least!’

To a devotee the Mother said, ‘How can one do without japa, and meditation? These have got to be done.’ When the devotee complained that the impurities of his mind were not being removed in spite of these, she said, ‘Through the practice of japa they will go. How can one afford to do without these practices?’ Another devotee asked the Mother (1907) about initiation, ‘Well, Mother, what’s the need of taking a mantra? If instead of doing japa of a particular mantra, one simply goes on repeating “Mother Kali”, “Mother Kali”, (for instance), will that not be sufficient?’ The Mother replied, ‘The mantra purifies the body. A man becomes holy by doing japa of the Lord’s mantra … The mantra is necessary for purification of the body, if not for anything else.’ On another occasion (February 1913), a disciple showed her a tiny seed of the huge banyan tree and said, ‘Do you see, Mother, how small it is — tinier even than the tiniest seed we know, and yet what a huge tree sprouts from it!’ The Mother said, ‘Why should it not be so? Consider, for instance, how small the seed of the Lord’s name is; and yet from this sprout in time divine moods, devotion and love.’

A disciple who had developed mental aberration returned his rosary to the Mother. When a monk asked her whether he had returned the mantra also, she replied, ‘Can that ever be? It’s a living mantra. Can there be any giving back of it — the mantra that one has once received, the great mantra that it is? If one has but once a love for his guru, can he ever be despoiled of it?’ About the efficacy of japa the Mother once said, ‘Byjapa and austerity is cut asunder the bondage of Karma (past action). But God can’t be realized except through love and devotion. As for japa and such other things, do you know what they stand for? Through them the senses etc., become subdued.’ On another day she said, ‘One should perform japa, meditation, etc., at regular hours giving no room for laziness.’ At other times she declared, ‘If one can repeat the mantra fifteen to twenty thousand times every day, then it will show results. Let him do so first, if he does not get success, let him come and say so. But one has to practice a little attentively. Doing nothing and neglecting everything, they merely complain, “Why does not myjapa bear fruit?”’ ‘Work you have to do as a matter of course; work keeps the mind well. But japa, meditation, and prayer are specially needed; one should sit up at least in the morning and in the evening. That is like the helm of a boat. When one sits up for a while in the evening, there comes to one’s mind for consideration what one has done throughout the day. Then one has to compare the state of mind one has today with what one had yesterday. Then one should meditate on one’s chosen Deity as one goes on doing japa. How can you know how you are conducting yourself unless you have japa and meditation every morning and evening side by side with work?’ ‘It’s very necessary to have a fixed time for japa and meditation.’ Again, she instructed certain advanced souls to have a constant remembrance of God. At the time of returning home (April 1919) after initiation at Koalpara, a certain devotee asked her, ‘Mother, what’s the secret?’ She pointed to a small timepiece in a niche, and said, ‘As that timepiece is ticking, so also go on repeating God’s name, that will bring you everything; nothing more need be done.’

In fact, japa occupied a very high place in her estimation. When instructing a gifted man about the path of knowledge, she might say now and then, ‘That japa or muttering is meant for women; you have your knowledge;’ but if we extend our search beyond such unusual utterances, we shall find her emphasizing the importance of japa again and again, and herself doing japa for the good of her disciples. Nevertheless, from a higher standpoint, she unequivocally decried japa as a mere mechanical process when she said, ‘These mantras and the like are nothing, my daughter; devotion is all. In the Master you will find your guru and chosen Deity. He is all.’ And drawing attention to divine grace she said, ‘You talk of having done so much of japa, or so much of work; but nothing will avail. Who can achieve anything unless

Mahamaya opens the way? O creatures, surrender yourselves, just surrender yourselves. Then only will She be gracious and clear the way for you.’ To another devotee she said, ‘Through japa and austerity the bondage of Karma is cut asunder, but God cannot be realized unless through love and devotion. Did the cowherds get Krishna by japa and meditation or by talking to him chummily as “Come here, dear”, “Take this, dear”, “Eat this, dear”?’

Till one attains this attitude of surrender and this passionate love, no spiritual practice is to be neglected; any one aspiring to salvation must have recourse to one of these practices. A consideration of the Mother’s instruction about the various disciplines will impress this fact on us. Sri Shyamacharan Chakravarty of Rangoon began practicing the control of breath for about three hours a day in accordance with what he had read in the Raja-yoga of Swami Vivekananda. As a result, he began to have a buzzing sound in his ears of which he could not be cured, so that he had to take leave from his office. On his visit to the Belur Math during this leave, he came to know of the Holy Mother and proceeded to Jayrambati. As soon as he set foot in the village, his ailment left him. Afterwards when he apprised the Mother of his intention to practice yoga, she replied, ‘What energy have you stored up in your body, my boy, and what have you in your mind that you want to practice yoga?’ ‘Have I no way out, then?’ asked the eager devotee. ‘I shall tell you whatever is to be done,’ assured the Mother. After initiation she instructed him to do japa twice daily. Shyamacharan wanted to do it thrice and wished to know if anything more need be done. The Mother repeated her instruction about doing japa twice daily and concluded, ‘That’s enough for all you want.’ ‘What shall I do when on a journey?’ inquired the disciple. ‘It will be enough if you think mentally,’ replied the Mother.

A monastic disciple asked her in Banaras (January 1913), ‘I have been practicing the control of breath a little;

should I continue it?’ The Mother replied, ‘You may do it just a little; it’s no good heating the brain by too much practice of it. And if the mind settles down of its own accord, what more need is there of the control of breath?’ This monk told the Mother again (June 1919) at Koalpara, ‘I have been practicing asanas (postures) for some time for the sake of health. These postures help digestion and strengthen the vow of celibacy.’ The Mother’s instruction was, ‘You may practice after taking into consideration both sides of the question, namely, that the mind may become too much body-conscious, and the total giving up may ruin health.’ This was her opinion about postures as resorted to for the sake of health. As for a suitable posture as a help to a long course of japa, she said, ‘Practice some sort of sitting posture which will help you to sit for two or three hours. When you feel as if pins and needless are pricking your leg, you may change your position. In course of time you will have no discomfort.’ She also urged on her disciples the need for such practices as worship. When the above devotee said in connection with the God Vishwanatha of Banaras, ‘Mother, we have no longer any liking for a stone image of Siva’, the Mother said with surprise, ‘How is that so, my boy? What a number of great sinners are coming to Banaras and getting redemption by touching

Vishwanatha! He is taking over everybody’s sin without demur.’ She also encouraged many to read the scriptural texts regularly, as for instance, some three or four verses from the Gita every day.

And yet it is true that she constantly warned the sentimental devotees against forgetting the ideals and sticking to rituals alone as the be-all and end-all of life. In a letter to Sri Rajendrakumar Datta (11-11-’ 16), she wrote, ‘What need I tell you about your proposal to wear the sacred thread?¹ This is no bad thing, though a social institution. With regard to these matters you should do as you think best. If you take up the sacred thread, see to it that it is adequately utilized. Do not adopt anything as a mere fad. You may do japa of any mantra you like after finishing first the japa of your chosen mantra. True it is that there is no hard and fast rule about the time of japa, yet morning and evening are the favourable periods. Whatever the time be, you must do japa every day; it is not good to forgo it any day. ’ Once on seeing some one worshipping Siva, a woman devotee felt a hankering to do likewise. When she came to the Mother for instruction and approval, the latter said, ‘All worship — of Kali, Durga, and others — can be performed with the mantra that I have imparted. But if anyone so desires, one can learn other mantras also for those purposes. You have no need of all that.’ When the question arose regarding the offering of food to the Master in accordance with scriptural formalities, the Mother said, ‘There’s no great need of scriptural forms. Everything can be done with the mantra of the chosen Deity. ’

From an examination of the times and places of initiation, as also of the persons receiving it, we are forced to the conclusion, that as the Mother had her eyes riveted on the one goal of life, viz., the realization of God, she could not possibly allow mere outward circumstances to interfere with her inner conviction. Any good means, be that enjoined by the scriptures, or adopted for the time being out of a sincere eagerness for excellence, that appeared to her as subservient to the main objective, she adopted without hesitation, and drew the disciples’ attention to it. This view is substantiated by her directions to her disciples with regard to the social and religious customs of everyday life.

Orthodoxy requires that the morning prayer and meditation should be done before eating. But Sri Shaurendra Mazumdar could not sit for his japa or meditation until he had his morning tea. Hence after initiation he told the Mother of this difficulty and wanted direction. The Mother told him, ‘My son, can a mother ever be stepmotherly? You may, if you like, first eat and then begin japa and meditation.’ Nalin Babu who had not finished his period of mourning, consequent on the death of his mother, hesitated to eat some cakes offered to him by the Holy Mother and asked for her advice, whereupon she said, ‘What’s the harm in that, my son? I too am your mother. I offer it, and there’s no transgression here.’ As for food, she advised Shyamacharan Chakravarty, ‘My son you can eat fish, meat, indeed anything you like. But the Master forbade eating the food connected with the first funeral obsequies following any death, or pertaining to a purificatory ceremony (after the main wedding).’

A woman devotee asked the Mother if it was permissible for a woman to perform worship if she happened to be suffering under any temporary social disability. The Mother referred her to what the Master had said to herself under similar circumstances and then added, ‘Yes, my daughter, it is permissible if one has the requisite devotion for the Master … you can worship; but if you feel any compunction, then don’t do it.’ But when another woman raised the same question on another day, the Mother said, ‘How can one do any work for gods and goddesses when in such a state? Well, you don’t do it. ’

Without ignoring settled norms, but rather giving an enlightened allegiance to them, the Mother wanted to draw the devotees to the path of fervent love. Her process of initiation, followed this middle course. In refusing initiation to a candidate she said, ‘You have your ancestral guru; you can as well have it from him.’ Again, there are instances where she kept intact the mantra of the family guru and adding to it a new one instructed the disciple to repeat first the former mantraten times and then repeat the new one. Such variations accorded with the dispositions of the candidates as also the Mother’s own natural mood. About this double initiation Sri Kumudbandhu Sen one day heard the Mother speak thus at the Sarkarbari Lane house: ‘Sometimes people of little faith and of unsteady mind come for initiation.

I mentally read their past history from their very appearance and behaviour and ask them whether they were previously initiated by someone else. When they reply in the affirmative, I tell them, “Strange You have come again for initiation! You have no faith in the mantra already given by your guru. What is a mantra but the holy name of God? Why have you come for initiation again?” Then they beg to be forgiven and again implore me with tears in their eyes. I can’t bear anybody’s tears. I pray to the Master for strengthening their faith, and through his direction I give them initiation in addition to the mantra already received by them. This additional mantra is given for fresh stimulus and strength in order to increase their faith in the name of God. ’ (Prabuddha Bharata, June 1952, p. 261).

She made a distinction between the teacher who initiates and the teacher who instructs. About this she wrote to a devotee (January 1911) that one might have an instructing teacher for technical yoga processes etc., but the initiating teacher must not be changed. When the letter of an applicant for initiation was read out to her (March 1914), she remarked, ‘The purpose of initiation is to try to realize God through sincere spiritual effort; it’s not meant for stopping the allowances of the family guru. I can agree to initiate this boy on condition that he will revere his family guru as much as he will do me and that he will agree to increase the guru’s monthly allowances according to his resources.’ The applicant agreed to these conditions and he was initiated. About the initiating teacher, the Mother had very liberal views. On being told that a man who had not much of spirituality was giving mantras to others, she said, ‘These holy men have something of professionalism But mind you, even this is efficacious. Men will not do anything of their own accord; but the instruction of these people will induce them to call on God a little.’ Yet, in spite of such generous feelings, she was not to be silenced by mere unreasonable demands or assertion of prescriptive rights. To Sri Taraknath Roy she wrote in a letter (March 1913), ‘Pay to the family guru his annual allowance, and something more also if you can afford; but where can you get the wherewithal to satisfy him with money?’ When a woman devotee wrote that she had been cursed by her family guru on being informed of her having been initiated by the Mother, the Mother had it written in reply, ‘Not even a brahmin’s curse touches one who takes refuge in the Master. You need have no fear. ’

One must have real craving for initiation. Granted that hankering, a way can be found out despite a thousand obstacles. A woman wrote to the Mother that she could not have her initiation because of the opposition of her husband’s parents. The Mother intimated to her that God was omnipresent, and that He would respond to all people’s calls. Another poor boy came to the ‘Udbodhan’ but went away disappointed without meeting the Mother because she was ill then. So he wanted to ascertain by means of a letter if he would be more fortunate when be turned up next time. The Mother remarked, ‘The point is this: anyone whose time is ripe for getting beyond the world, will come away tearing off all bonds, nobody can keep him back even with fetters. Want of money, waiting for a reply, fear of returning disappointed — all these are meaningless.’ The Mother permitted him to come. Before married women were initiated, the Mother made sure that they had their husbands’ consent. If such concurrence was forthcoming she initiated the wife even though the husband might not be a disciple.

Those who came for initiation to her were seldom rejected unless it was physically impossible for her. If it was a pure soul, she gave the mantra even without being asked for, or she did so on the very first approach. Vaikuntha Babu of Cuttack met the Mother at Kothar. He had no idea of taking initiation at the time and therefore returned home after bowing down to her. But a strong attraction brought him back to Kothar in some four days. When he went to pay his respects to the Mother on the eve of his return this time, she said, ‘Well, stay here for the morrow and go the day after. ’ Later he was told that the Mother would bless him, and so he must get ready on the morrow. He understood nothing of this; still at the Mother’s call he appeared before her the next day. She asked him, ‘Will you take mantra?’ Vaikuntha answered, ‘Kindly give, if it so pleases you. I know nothing.’ Then the Mother again inquired, ‘Of which deity will you have the mantra?’Vaikuntha found no answer, for he had not thought over the matter. The Mother, therefore, chose the mantra for him

The Mother was once staying in Calcutta recovering from a prolonged illness at Jayrambati, which had heavily told on her health. All interviews were, therefore, stopped. At that time there came a Parsi youth to meet her. He had read some of Swami Vivekananda’s books and felt drawn towards Vedanta. Being impressed by him, Swami Saradananda allowed him to go upstairs to the Mother’s presence. Once there, he implored, ‘Revered Mother, give me some great mantra through which I may realize the Lord.’ At this the Mother turned to Brahmachari Rashbihari and said, ‘Shall I give? Yes, let me do so.’ Rashbihari intervened, ‘How can that be so! You have just recovered from illness, nobody is allowed even to see you! What will Sarat Maharaj think when he hears of this! Not now, it can be in future.’ The Mother said, ‘Very well, go and consult Sarat.’ When the Brahmachari returned with Swami Saradananda’s unquestioning consent, he found the Mother waiting ready with Ganges water and two small carpets spread for herself and the Parsi youth. After the initiation she said, ‘He’s a fine boy; he understood what I said well enough. ’

In fact, the Mother imparted initiation because of a felt inspiration. She used to say, ‘The Master is sending these (candidates),’ or ‘No, no; I am nobody. It’s the Master who graciously blesses them. I am only his instrument. ’

During such initiation, difference of languages created no real difficulty. She spoke in Bengali, but the disciples understood her. When she was in the South, the local people came and begged, ‘Mantra, please!’ ‘Instruction, please!’ There also she knew that to be the apt mantra for a particular candidate which welled up from her heart spontaneously. She used to say, ‘As soon as I am about to impart a mantra to some people, there arises in the mind such a thought as “Give this”, “Give this”, whereas in other cases, it appears as though I know nothing, nothing comes to my mind. I keep on sitting. Then after a long cogitation I can visualize the mantra. In the case of a good aspirant the mantra springs up from the mind instantaneously. ’

At times the Mother initiated small boys. A boy of twelve years began to cry after saluting her at the ‘Udbodhan’ saying, ‘I want the Mother’s grace.’ Everybody threw cold water on such sentimentalism, considering it nothing more than a childish whim or imitation. Next day an attendant of the Mother saw the boy sitting on the verandah outside the building. Such a sight was nothing unusual. Therefore he went to the market without heeding him But while returning, he became curious to see the boy departing with a smiling face, and on asking him the reason for this, he was intrigued to learn that the boy had been initiated. Returning to the ‘Udbodhan’, he learnt about the whole incident. The Mother had sent Radhu downstairs saying, ‘You will find a boy sitting below the porch; bring him up.’ And thus she had given him the mantra; and now the boy was on his way to the market to get some fruits and sweets to be offered to the Mother as guru-dakshina¹ The attendant asked her, ‘Mother, how strange it is that you have initiated such a small urchin What does he understand?’ The Mother replied, ‘Howsoever that may be, my son, he is a boy; and yesterday he cried so much holding on to my feet! Tell me, whoever weeps for God? How many have such strong inclination?’

Two or three days before the Janmashtami that followed the Mother’s return from Rameswaram, a young Brahmachari of Koalpara wanted to take mantra from her. He was then thirteen years old and was a favourite of the Mother. But the proposal evoked great opposition from Golap-Ma, who said,

‘ Strange that such a small boy, who will forget the mantra in a couple of days, should want initiation even now! The Mother hails from your parts. Take the mantralater, after due consideration of everything, when she goes that side.’ So saying she left the place. The Mother, however, said, ‘See, how Golap talks! Does anyone forget what one learns as a boy? Let him do whatever he can even from this time. And then I am there, to be sure.’ The initiation took place on the Janmashtami day. Finding the boy making his japa exactly as the Mother had shown, she said, ‘There you are! Why should not this little thing stick to his mind? It certainly will. In future when the need arises, I shall show you everything over again.’ The initiation over, the Mother gave him two sweets to eat, which had earlier been offered to the Master, and said, ‘Don’t be shy; one should partake of some prasada after the initiation.’

And yet, this was not the general custom. One day when somebody raised the question of the initiation of a boy of some seven or eight years of age, the

Mother said, ‘He is too young still; how can there be any initiation now? The boy is a devotee. Let him have long life, let him be a servant of the devotees.’

We have said that if the candidate was a desirable person, and if the Mother felt the inspiration, she did not take time and circumstances much into consideration. A devotee from Shillong resolved within himself that he would not go to the Mother unless he saw her seven times in dreams which would establish for him her divinity. Having been blessed with the seven visions through the Mother’s grace, he went to Jayrambati to see her. When he was about to take leave of her, she said, ‘It is best to have your initiation before you go.’ The devotee suggested that it might as well take place in Calcutta. But the Mother said, ‘No, my son, let this thing be finished; it can be done even today.’ The devotee reminded her, ‘But I have partaken of prasada.’ The Mother did not consider that any bar to the initiation and imparted the mantra. In truth, the grace of a true guru cannot be delimited by conditions.

One evening, a boy who had just been released from police vigilance, came to Koalpara to seek initiation. The Mother took a natural pity on him and agreed to bless him the next day. But since the Koalpara Ashrama was then in the bad books of the police, and the harbouring of an erstwhile suspect would give them another excuse for harassing the inmates, he was lodged in a house outside. Early next morning as the Mother was going from her own residence, the Jagadamba-Ashrama, to Radhu’s house, the boy met her in the open field after his morning bath. Being ordered by the Mother, the Brahmachari brought for her a glass of water. Then it seemed as though she was searching for something to sit on. Hence the Brahmachari inquired, ‘Shall I bring carpets for you?’ ‘Never mind,’ said the Mother. ‘You need not go again; get some straw, and let us both sit down.’ Thus seated the Mother washed her lips ceremonially and gave him the mantra.

The Mother was waiting on the railway platform at Vishnupur for her train to Calcutta when an up-country porter discovered her and hurrying to her said fervently, ‘You are my mother Sita; what a long time I have been searching for you! Where had you been so long?’ And he began weeping. The Mother took mercy on him, consoled him, and asked him to bring a flower. The man offered that flower at her feet, and she gave him the mantra.

Under the eaves of her house at Jayrambati the Mother stood one day accepting the salutations of her sons. Last of all came one who held her feet and wept profusely without explaining why he did so. The Mother understood his tearful prayer and signalling all to move away, gave him initiation, even while standing where she was.

From Ranchi there arrived a boy along with others to witness the Jagad-dhatri worship at the Mother’s place at Jayrambati. But owing to the busy programme of the days of celebration, he found no opportunity to beg for initiation, nor did anybody else create any scope for him to do so, since he was considered to be too young for the purpose. When the day of bidding farewell came, the Mother was in indifferent health and remained indoors. The Ranchi boy, along with other devotees, went to the verandah of the room and waited there for his turn to go in and prostrate himself before her.

When all had finished, he stepped in and began weeping so bitterly with his head on the Mother’s feet that they became wet. The Mother lifted him up and asked, ‘Why do you weep my son? What do you want? Will you take mantra?’ The boy nodded. The Mother then closed the door and initiated him then and there.

The Mother had a girl-friend of her childhood days in the village. As they lay side by side one day, the Mother imparted the mantra to this friend.

Though it was true that under special circumstances the Mother forgot time or places, it is not to be inferred that such was the normal procedure. Usually she abided by tradition. For instance, she did not give initiation at

Banaras, saying, ‘Siva is the guru here.’ She was not ordinarily willing to initiate anyone on the birthday of the Master, though she made exceptions to this rule. For instance, she initiated two persons on that day during her stay in Madras. On another occasion a sickly young man came to Jayrambati to be initiated on that day. He had not birth or wealth to back up his prayer. But the Mother looked into one’s heart rather than at one’s appearance; and when the man pleaded that unless he was initiated on that very day, he would consider himself extremely unfortunate inasmuch as he would not be able to come again in his whole life, the Mother became gracious and although earlier she had intimated her unwillingness, and the attendant too now pleaded against her waiving her rule, she initiated the man that very day.

There are many examples to prove that the Mother selected the mantras in accordance with the mental makeup of the candidates. A young woman married to a cultured family went to her husband’s house soon after initiation. There she meditated and did japa regularly; but she was ever in doubt as to whether the mantrawas being properly pronounced. When she met the Mother after three years, she wanted to get the doubt resolved. Hearing of the difficulty, the Mother said, ‘Well, my dear, that happened long ago. Can I have it in mind even now? Anyway you don’t say anything, but wait a little; let me ask of the Master.’ With these words, she entered the shrine, and coming out after a while said, ‘Well, my daughter, did I give you this mantra?’ The disciple admitted that she did. ‘Then you repeat it,’ said the Mother, ‘there’s no error in it.’

When Sri Rasiklal Roy approached the Mother for initiation, she wanted to ascertain from him his hereditary mantra. Rasiklal did not know this. The Mother kept quiet for a moment and then spoke, ‘This is your family mantra,’ and initiated him with it. On inquiry afterwards, it was proved that the Mother had not made any mistake.

When Sri Shashibhushan Mukherji of Bagda prayed for initiation in the mantra of the Sakti cult, the Mother corrected him by saying, ‘My son, I see Rama in you. Do the people of your family do japa of Rama’s mantra? Rama and Sakti are identical, to be sure. Then why should there be any hesitation in accepting the Rama mantra?’ In fact, the whole family was devoted to Sri Ramachandra.

Though most often, family traditions and personal predilections coincided, in certain cases people ignored the tutelary deities and chose other aspects of God; and instill others, family tradition differed from individual disposition. In such circumstances the Mother relied on her crystal clear mind and as such correctly reflected for them the requisite mantra. Though the ancestors of Sri Saradakinkar Roy were worshippers of Sakti, he came under Vaishnava influence. Hence when he got a Sakti mantra from the Mother, he became a little perplexed. The Mother understood this and assured him that very afternoon out of her own accord, ‘I have given you the right thing. ’

In some cases the Mother asked the candidates about their preferences before the mantras were selected. If the candidates’ choice tallied with her own, she used those mantras; otherwise her own vision got the pride of place. Sri Surendramohan Mukherji, when asked by the Mother, said that he had an attraction for Kali as seated on the lap of Siva. The Mother asserted, ‘Can Sakti (Kali) ever exist without Siva, my son? Yours is the Sakti mantraAfter receiving initiation in that mantra, Surendramohan felt as though an electric current darted through his frame which began to quiver, so that he had no longer any doubt regarding the appropriateness of the mantra.

From Sri Karnatkumar Chaudhury we heard a charming anecdote which confirms much of what we have written so far. He had taken a mantra from another guru, but found no peace of mind. While in such a predicament he went to make obeisance to the Mother at the ‘Udbodhan’ in 1914 before he started for an assemblage of Vaishnavas at Vrindaban. The Mother was then seated for worship in the shrine. As Karnatkumar saluted her from outside, she motioned him to enter the room and salute her by touching her feet. This done, the Mother blessed him saying, ‘Govinda (Krishna) will bless you.’ This put new strength in him; but his old doubts persisted. After that his first wife died and he married a second time. As this wife was a woman possessed, he had her initiation by his own guru. This, however, had no effect. At last the couple came to the Mother at Calcutta in 1916 for re-initiation. The Mother agreed to their proposal. But Golap-Ma got wind of this and objected, so that

Karnatkumar had to come to the Mother again for reassurance. The Mother raised her hand as a sign of reaffirmation and said, ‘I have already given you the word.’ On the day of initiation the wife got fever. Nonetheless, they bathed in the Ganges and came to the Mother. Karnatkumar got his initiation first. In the meantime his wife’s temperature shot up and she began shaking all over. In that room there were Golap-Ma and Sudhira Devi with her. Seeing the condition of the wife, Golap-Ma began admonishing her in her blunt way, ‘She has come to reject her old guru. She has forgotten her mantra, and to crown all, she has got fever. There can be no question of initiation at all.’

The Mother waited in the shrine-room for some time for the wife to turn up, and in the meantime she heard all that Golap-Ma said. Unmoved by Golap-Ma’s arguments and impatient of delay, she called out at last, ‘Sudhira, do bring her.’ Thus the wife also was initiated. After this she got rid of her trouble.

Sometimes people got initiation in dreams and approached the Mother for confirmation or re-initiation. When one such devotee came, the Mother heard from the person the mantra received in the dream, explained its meaning, asked him to use it in his japa, and then imparting a new one said, ‘Then do japa of this one and meditate.’ The Mother was seen meditating a while before explaining the dream mantra.

Another devotee got a mantra from the Master in a dream. The Mother told him, ‘Repeat the mantra that the Master has given you. I shall give you something too,’ and she gave him a new mantra.

A boy saw in a dream that the Master seated him on his lap and imparted a mantra. The Mother did not give him any other mantra but said, ‘You have succeeded in obtaining his grace. You will attain your goal through the japa of this mantra alone.’

As soon as a certain woman devotee uttered the Bija (seed) of a mantra she had received in a dream, the Mother said, ‘Yes, you belong to that fold. Well, well, you are fortunate.’ She did not add any fresh mantra, but instructed her to do japa of this very mantra.

But a mantra, just because it was received in a supernormal way, had no appeal to the Mother unless it conformed to scriptures and her own unerring vision. Sri Jatindranath Roy used in his japa a mantra he had received in a dream. The Mother said, ‘Well, dear boy, can there be a mantra without a Bija? ’ So she gave him initiation again with a fresh mantra. Kusumkumari Aich desired to be initiated by the Mother; but one thing or another hindered her from doing so. In the meanwhile, she got a mantra in a dream, which, however, brought her no peace of mind. Hence she went to the Mother and related to her the whole history, on hearing which the latter said, ‘Some being is trying to encompass your ruin and to that end has given you that mantra in the name of three deities. You need have no fear any longer. Try to forget those few words as early as you can.’ Then she gave her initiation with an altogether different mantra.

Though she was ever merciful and her life’s mission was to save and help people, yet for their own good she often made them wait for some time or refused them at first, so that their eagerness might be intensified or they might repent by detecting their faults through self-analysis consequent on dejection. Sri Nareshchandra Chakravarty went to Jayrambati in the middle of January 1920 with a candidate for initiation at the bidding of Swami Dhirananda; and with them joined another gentleman. As the Paush-Samkranti day is observed in Bengal with the eating of many kinds of cakes, and their visit took place near about that time, there arose on the way a desire in Nareshchandra’s mind to eat some cakes at the Mother’s house; but he kept silent about the matter. After they had reached Jayrambati and finished their bath, the proposal for initiation was communicated to the Mother through Kishori    Maharaj    (Swami Parameshwarananda); but the Mother refused. And when she was told that Swami Dhirananda had sent them, she said with a little irritation, ‘What of that? My health is extremely bad; should I initiate in spite of that?’ This refusal made the two candidates weep, but Kishori Maharaj could not gather up courage enough to approach the Mother again. However, at meal-time at noon Nareshchandra saw that he had on his plate the desired cakes; but as soon as he thought, ‘Why has Mother sent this dry stuff; could she not procure a little milk?’ he heard the Mother saying, ‘Kishori, why have you served dry cakes to the boys? Send them some milk soon. ’ This emboldened Naresh; hence after siesta, he himself went to the Mother at the suggestion of the friends and interceded on their behalf, whereupon she said, ‘So you also advise me to initiate them?’ ‘Yes, Mother, I do so,’ said Nareshchandra with some emphasis. ‘But what of the extreme impurity of their bodies?’ argued the Mother. And she herself added, ‘Well, ask them to live here for three nights. A three nights’ stay will purify their bodies; for verily this is Siva’s domain.’ And as she spoke, she turned her forefinger around to indicate the entire sacred area.

At the ‘Udbodhan’ when Sri Vasantakumar Sarkar’s wife begged to be initiated just after her husband had been blessed with the mantra, the Mother directed her for initiation from some monk at the Belur Math. As Vasantakumar’s wife persisted in her importunity, the Mother refused again with some annoyance and sat down for worship. This cut her to the quick, and she fell down on the floor with extreme grief and then began singing piteously,

Can She that is the stone-built mountain’s daughter have any pity at heart?

Unless She were pitiless, could She kick Her husband on the chest?¹

The sweet voice and pathetic tone distracted the Mother’s attention from the worship. She ordered the wailing woman to sing a few more songs and then asked her to stop, for she could not begin worship so long as she sang. The worship over, the candidate made her request again, which was readily granted. The Mother fixed a date for the happy day and as a present put a betel roll in the devotee’s mouth.

Another point to be noted is that, though the Mother was ever merciful, all frivolity and all irrational demands were silenced before her august presence. Sri Navadvip-chandra Roy Varman, who obtained permission for the initiation of two young men, produced them at the ‘Udbodhan’ on the appointed day. The older of the two was initiated first, and then came the turn of the younger one, who, however, was nowhere to be found. The Mother said sorrowfully, ‘The poor fellow is unlucky!’ Subsequently, being asked about this flight, the younger one said that his mind was seized with an inexplicable fear.

Sri Chandramohan Datta, who belonged to the salaried staff of the ‘Udbodhan’, did many odd jobs for the Mother such as going to the market, in which connection he had free access to her. One day in the morning, Swami Shuddhananda, while going to the Ganges for bath with Swami Prajnananda, said to Chandramohan, in mere fun, ‘Well, Chandra, you go to the Mother often enough and get from her prasada to eat. I tell you something; can you put this to the Mother?’ ‘There’s no question of not being able,’ assured Chandramohan. The Swami said, ‘Can you tell Mother, “Mother, I want salvation”?’ ‘You wait a little,’ said Datta with bravado. ‘I shall go forthwith and return in a trice after telling her.’ When he went up, the Mother was at her worship. Slowly he walked in, but he felt that for some reason his body shivered. Soon the Mother looked at him and wanted to know the reason for his coming. His heart still palpitated and something seemed to choke his throat. As a matter of sheer habit, however, he said, ‘I want prasada.’ The Mother showed him by a sign the prasada kept covered under the cot and again engaged herself in the worship. It took him about an hour to get over that nervousness.

1. He was then a Brahmachari, but left the Order after remaining in it for some years.

1. Refers to a movement for the wearing of the sacred thread by certain classes of non-brahmins who assert themselves as really belonging to the twice-born castes— Kshatriyas and Vaishyas—though their forefathers discarded the thread for some reason.

1. Offering in kind or cash to be given to the guru after one’s initiation.

1. Uma, identical with Kali in another form, was daughter of the god of the Himalayas, a heartless mass of rocks. Kali on one occasion stood on the chest of her husband Siva.