Self-surrender and spiritual discipline

Mother: That they surrender themselves to God,that they live placing implicit trust in Him, is their spiritual discipline, Alas ! Naren said, “ Let me have millions of births, what do I fear ? ” It is true. Does a man of knowledge ever fear rebirth ? He does not commit any sin. It is the ignorant peVson who is always seized with fear. He alone gets entangled. He becomes polluted by sin. For millions of births he suffers from endless miseries, he undergoes infinite pains, and at last he craves for God.

Disciple : Yes, through experience he gets his lessons and then attains knowledge.

Mother: Yes, the calf makes the sound of Ham Hai, Ham Hai ’ (I am, I am). He makes the same sound even after drums and other instruments are made from his hide and entrails. At last he goes into the hand of a carder and then he makes the sound Turn Hai, Turn Hai’ (it is Thou, it is Thou).1

1 The reference is to the following Parable of Sri Rama-krishna : So long as egotism is not eradicated, there is no salvation for man. Look at the young calf and the troubles that come upon it through egotism. As soon as it is born it cries Ham Hai, Ham Hai ’—I am, I am. And look at the bitter experiences it has to pass through ! For when it grows up, if it is an ox, it is yoked to the plough or made to drag heavily loaded carts ; if a cow, it is kept tied to a post and is sometimes killed and eaten. In spite of all this suffering and even after its death, the animal does not lose its egotism ; for the drums that are made out of its hide continue to give the same egotistic note ‘ Ham ‘, At last it learns humility when the cotton carder makes bow-strings out of its entrails. For then through the bowstrings it sings ‘ Tu Hai ‘ Tu Hai —Thou Art, Thou Art. The . I ’ must go and give place to ‘ Thou ‘, This does not happen until the man becomes spiritually awakened.